Oh All Encompassing Mr. Mubarak! Help us hate the Jew!

Rumour-mongering is what we do best, Oh leader. It's what keeps us on our toes against the marauding Jew on the other side of our fiercely defended borders. We know that when things go wrong we look to the Jew, for 'tis he who has told us not to queue in an orderly fashion for a metro ticket. We are all too aware that Jew women have lured our men in Sinai across the border and turned them into spies (after a shag that is)! We are all too aware that "Ariel" washing up powder contains the poisonous dandruff of Sharon! And we are all too aware that Jewish scientists invented hashish, which ensures we stay lit all day.